True Blood's Faux Feminism: A Review in Progress

(I started writing this post over the summer and wanted to share it before I forget. It's a work in progress.)

*Spoiler alert: I'll be revealing some details from the most recent season of True Blood.

The season opener was a shocker with the reveal that Tara is now a lesbian or bisexual. After romantic and tumultuous entanglements with Sam, Jason, Eggs, and Franklin, Tara escapes from Bon Tomp and begins a relationship with Naomi, a fellow cage fighter.

What frustrates me about this relationship is that Tara's transformation into a gay character occurs as a way out or alternative to her failed relationships with men. It is also a relationship I'm sure the writers thought up to excite the viewers. The "lesbian makeout" scene has been glamorized in numerous movies. Recently, the Natalie Portman and Mila Kunis kiss in Black Swan might have made more headlines than the film's accolades.

Another issue I have is that being gay always means that the character is moving over to the dark side, becoming more "sexy" and "dangerous." Natalie Portman becomes the "black swan" after the fantasy sex scene with Mila Kunis. She drinks, does drugs, and experiments with her body, which becomes the equivalent of being "bad" in our culture. Why is that? Why can't being gay be a part of who a person is instead of a “performance” for others?

This is new territory for me on my blog, and I do not know a lot about sexuality studies, but what I do observe is the lack of lesbian couples on television and the same scene played over and over again. The good girl becomes “bad” after she kisses a woman. Even in the film, Laurel Canyon, starring Kate Beckinsale and Christian Bale this story line exists. Kate’s character is a good doctoral student who is lured into the dark side by Christian’s music producer mother. They then engage in a makeout scene. The list goes on with celebrities that have made kissing women a “trend” (Thanks, Katy Perry!)

I just finished reading Susan Douglass’s Enlightened Sexism where she wrote about the problematic portrayals in television and movies where lesbians are sexualized or ignored. She proposes that this gap adds to the divide between women. Women in films must compete with each other for men or make out to please the male audience. Female love is only shown from a male perspective because why would we want women in successful friendships since they would only want to gang up on men!

Could Megan Fox Be "Nice" and "Naughty"?

After listening to Jean Kilbourne's enlightening lecture yesterday on the harmful media messages that contribute to the thin, perfect beauty ideal, I almost passed out after seeing this cover of Cosmo with Megan Fox. First, how many more surveys can Cosmo possibly come up with to tell women how to satisfy men? What ever happened to talking to your partner about what he enjoys sexually? Second, what about what women want to see during sex? Because sex is a one-sided act?!


Anyhow, the real point of this post is about how the magazine portrays Megan Fox. The tagline for her article states, "Megan Fox. Naughty or Nice? You Decide" and yet, hasn't the magazine already decided for us by putting this seductive image of Megan on the cover?

This article goes on to discuss Megan's tough girl image. This image is based around the fact that she curses and has tattoos. Well during a rough day, I've been known to use some swear words, so I guess I'm a tough girl too?! There is a problem with the limiting language we use to discuss women. Why is it so important that a woman is either naughty or nice? This article doesn't ask her about anything of substance, so we are led to believe that she is either naughty or nice. She can only fit within these two descriptions because according to this article, she doesn't have a brain. Why must we reduce women to these one-note images?

Drink Crystal Light and You'll "Get Wet" with an Attractive Man on an Exotic Island

I chose this title for my post because it points out the absurdity of this new Crystal Light commercial. Two "workaholic" women on a plane don't need to worry about bikini season until they get into a plane crash and find themselves stranded on an island with an attractive man. It ends with an image of a woman taking off her shirt saying "I'm going to get wet." So, what's so problematic about this commercial? It makes the assumption that women need to constantly fret about their weight because you never know when you'll get into a plane crash and be getting wet with a perfectly chiseled model?!


It also assumes that if you drink Crystal Light, you will be more attractive to a man, making a point that a woman's only power is her physical body and sexuality. The commercial begins with these women exclaiming that they won't be having fun because they are too busy working, so the working woman becomes this haggard, boring, and uninteresting archetype. 


I think what frustrates me the most about this commercial is the commentary surrounding it. For example, a blogger wrote, "I feel like women with a sense of humor appreciate this too. But there’s a few groups who might derail the happy feelings: angry feminists and prude conservatives. ANYTHING slightly controversial in a gendered manner tends to get the ire of feminists."


First, let's break those stereotypes about feminists (refer to this video for further details). Also, I saw an incredible documentary yesterday called Miss Representation. It examines how the media controls the choices young men and women make about their bodies, relationships, and careers. If young girls only see women on television taking off their clothes for men, then what kind of ambitions will they have for the future? Sure, this is just one commercial and many children might not pick up on the sexual innuendo, but all forms of media such as commercials, movies, television shows, etc. contribute to a big problem consuming young women. It's not funny that young women think they must dress "sexy" or diet to the point of starvation to become successful professionally and romantically. How do young women develop healthy senses of self amidst these controversial, limiting images? 

These images affect everyone and inform the ways men and women communicate with each other. It saddens me that so often I overhear the same conversation among men:

Boy 1: Hey, what did you do last night?

Boy 2: Man, I was hammered last night, and I think I banged like five girls.

These images and conversations need to be questioned. When I make these statements, Michael Jackson's lyrics to "Man in the Mirror" play in my head. 

I'm starting with the man in the mirror. I'm asking him to change his ways. If you want to make the world a better place, just look at yourself and make that change...

(Click to see a clip of Glee performing "Man in the Mirror")

Rihanna's Not Your Role Model

On Tuesday, Rihanna was named Esquire's Sexiest Woman Alive. To celebrate her title, she posed nude for the magazine's cover.

She offers some interesting comments in the article about not thinking she is "sexy" while she simulates sex on stage during her concerts and admits to wearing racy outfits. While there is nothing wrong with embracing sexuality, Rihanna's songs position her and her listeners as sex objects. In the interview, she shares that she "doesn't want to be anyone's role model. She just wants to be a musician." I would argue that just being a musician is not possible when millions of children consume her music and image.

Funny or Offensive? You Decide.

(http://cdn.buzznet.com/media-cdn/jj1/headlines/2011/06/

justin-timberlake-mila-kunis-mtv-movie-awards-2011.jpg)

Take a moment to consider what's going on in this picture... I was confused at first until I found this link. At the MTV Movie Awards, presenters, Mila Kunis and Justin Timberlake shared with the audience that they have "never dated, are just friends, and are like brother and sister." This sibling relationship was demonstrated by touching each other on stage. 


Okay, I would NEVER do that to my brother. I don't think it's funny to do that in front of a live audience, and really Justin was it necessary to comment about the size of your penis afterward? Now that I'm processing this image, I am uncomfortable with it and the thought that young children were probably watching this show. I LOVE Mila Kunis, and I respect her for publicly speaking about her struggles to be a successful woman in the television and movie industries. Yet, there are aspects of her image that frustrate me. Is she a woman comfortable with her sexuality or is she putting on a show for her male fans? I think it's interesting that we read about celebrities' personal lives and view them in films and feel as if we know them. It is kind of creepy now that I think about it. You decide.

Well SAID...

I LOVE this blog post I read on Feministe... It's a well-articulated reflection on the criticisms single women endure. Chally makes a strong statement writing:


"There’s nothing deficient about finding yourself single, or pursuing the kind of life you want. I know that much of my personal unhappiness comes from not fitting various norms, and feeling like I ought to be more normal in order to have a happy life. That’s not an unwarranted fear as there’s real social marginalisation attached to being non-normative. If we expand our ideas of the kinds of lives that are acceptable, older divorced women; young ladies like me who are starting to build their lives; queer, asexual, and poly people; hey, even happily married straight people – all kinds of people! – will be better served."


The next time someone tells me that "I would be 'happier' if I had a boyfriend" that is the response I'm giving.

What if Cinderella just wanted to Hook Up with Prince Charming?

http://penglipurlara.files.wordpress.com/2011/05/disney-cinderella.jpg

A few weeks ago, I saw the film Water for Elephants starring Reese Witherspoon and Robert Pattinson. In the film, Robert Pattinson’s Jacob discovers the dangers and excitement of circus life after his parents are killed in a car accident. He falls for the beautiful Marlena (Reese Witherspoon), the wife of the abusive and cruel ringmaster. I won’t spoil the ending, but I will say that Jacob takes extensive measures to prove his love and loyalty to Marlena. Yes, it isn’t the traditional boy meets girl, they date, and live happily ever after storyline, but there was something romantic and sweet about Jacob’s pursuit of Marlena. I left the theater thinking: How often do men pursue the women of their dreams in the modern dating world?

The fairy tale model where boy meets girl and they run off into the sunset has been twisted, revised, expanded, and turned upside down in recent films. Hook up culture doesn’t fit in well with the happily ever after messages we’re told when we’re young. Can you imagine Cinderella telling Prince Charming after he puts on her glass slipper that she would “just like to hook up and have meaningless fun for a few weeks and then find a new prince” instead of the magical kiss and marriage? I’m going to take a wild guess and say that version would not be popular with parents and young children. Yet, these are the messages young people are navigating through in the modern dating world.

While there is an archetype of the non-committal, sex-crazed male in films such as Knocked Up and American Pie, there are new male and female archetypes emerging to keep up with the changing dating climate. For example, in 500 Days of Summer, Joseph Gordon Levitt’s Tom declares his love for Summer when she openly admits that she doesn’t want a commitment. His heart is broken, yet their relationship I think offers a reality in the dating world. Sometimes things don’t work out, and sometimes one person has different expectations than the other person in a relationship. Tom loves Summer while she is hesitant and anti-committal.

Tom's seeing birds and leading a musical in the park while Summer isn't sharing the love...

http://www.wrensnestonline.com/blog/wp-content/500-days-of-summer1.jpg

The woman who just wants sex without the love is a rising female model Hollywood has used in the films No Strings Attached and Friends With Benefits. I find it amusing that two films with the exact same plot have been released in the same year with actresses that starred in the same Oscar winning movie. While on the surface, the “new” Hollywood leading lady is career-driven and in charge of her sexuality. Yet, is this an empowering view of women? A woman that knows what she wants. I would say no since at the end of the movie she usually changes her mind and trades the career for love. While I think a woman has every right to enjoy her career and hook up, Hollywood films such as No Strings Attached just teach young people that a career is a substitute for a relationship and being in a relationship is of course the best judge of a woman’s character.

So, how do we make sense of these confusing messages? Should a woman wait for Prince Charming to arrive on his white horse? Should she engage in hook up culture? Should she find a “fun friend” to magically fall in love with after weeks of hooking up? Does this actually happen in real life!? I don’t think these answers are simple because I think our society has set up guidelines to punish a woman for whatever choice she makes. If she waits too long, she’ll become a spinster or a prude. Think about Kate Middleton a.k.a “Waity Katie” as deemed by the British press when Prince William wouldn’t propose to her. If she’s too quick to hook up, then she’s called a “slut.” She gets around “too much” and other women resent and judge her. This is a frustrating trap for me, and maybe one day I’ll just get to a point where I don’t care as much anymore.

Below are a few links on this topic:

A Wall Street Journal Blogger on women who want sex while a man wants commitment in Hollywood films.

A review of recent studies done about hooking up on college campuses.

A critique from Fox News about Hollywood's glamorization of domestic violence in teen romances on shows like Gossip Girl and Twilight.

A Round Up of New Links to Explore

I've been getting a lot of topics to post lately, so before I forget, here are some interesting links I've found. 


1. AOL Music interviewed Jordan Sparks about her recent body transformation and new song. While at first I was skeptical since so many celebrities have come out lately with dramatic weight loss news, I think Jordan Sparks offers a positive message, saying that she wanted to become active and get more energy for herself. Even if she had good intentions and feels better about herself, she cannot control the language that the media uses to discuss her weight loss. The article focuses on her new svelte figure and evolved image, manipulating Jordan's reasons for losing weight.


2. Is Beyonce becoming more "white"? Check out this image of her fourth album cover. When I first looked at it, I didn't recognize her. This is a common trend with female singers. For more information, look at this image of Shakira before fame and after fame.


3. Continuing with the topic of Beyonce, she's decided to fight childhood obesity with Michelle Obama through her song "Move Your Body." Click the link to see her music video. It frustrates me that childhood obesity is framed as a problem that needs fighting and that exercise seems to be the only "solution" discussed in conversations about body image.

http://www.dyfuse.com/files/images/beyonce-move-your-body-video.preview.jpg

4. In recent studies about "Why Women Have Sex", researchers found that sex is more complicated for women, and that 1 in 3 women report feeling sad after having sex. The author considers the reasons why women have sex. For example, if a woman is having "revenge" sex, then maybe it explains why she is sad afterwards. Reading the comments below this article was enlightening because many of the readers feel the same way I do. One reader wrote, "Is it possible that women have the same sexual desires as any other species on the planet?" I agree. Can't a woman enjoy sex because of the same reasons as a man? Why are men allowed to have limitless desires while women must have reasons for having sex? 

Tell me. What's so dangerous about my desires?

A few weeks ago I did a presentation on Catherine Breillat. She’s a French filmmaker, actress, and writer, known for her films that push the boundaries of censorship. Her films feature nudity and graphic sex scenes. She writes about women that explore their sexuality and desires without shame and embarrassment. I was excited to research her because it’s rare to find a woman in the media so open and honest about sex. In the media, female desire comes with many stigmas. It’s dangerous, dirty, unknown, silenced, and forbidden.

Breillat offers her opinion stating in an interview, “It's a joke - if men can't desire liberated women, then tough. Does it mean they can only desire a slave? Men need to question the roots of their own desire. Why is it that historically men have this need to deny women to be able to desire them?” Women lack the language and tools to discuss their desires because they are always labeled as dangerous. Our society wouldn’t want a woman actually admitting to liking sex. How could her desires ever be equal to men or teenage boys who don’t have any control over their wild hormones!

I’ve been puzzled with those questions over the last few weeks. Eve Ensler, the creator of “The Vagina Monologues” stated that women’s empowerment is deeply connected to their sexuality. Yet, if women’s sexuality is constantly being denied and ignored, how can women hope to reach the heights of men? I had the privilege of seeing “The Vagina Monologues” performed a few weeks ago while I was visiting Hillary in Indiana. It is a set of monologues compiled after 200 interviews with women discussing sex, relationships, and their vaginas. The monologues present areas of women’s experiences that have been neglected and considered “dirty.” I think it is through work like this that women’s experiences can gain value and respect.

Female desires will continue to be dangerous as long as young girls and boys remain clueless about birth control. I do not know what the solution to sexual education is, but I do know that young people are having sex, and they are not prepared with the consequences. Let’s break the cycle. Let’s start talking about sex, bodies, protection, and vaginas.

Here are some links you might enjoy:

This is a great book I read in my Introduction to Sociology course freshman year about the lack of knowledge about teenage girl’s sexual desires: http://www.amazon.com/Dilemmas-Desire-Teenage-Girls-Sexuality/dp/0674018567

A brief history on Catherine Breillat: http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0106924/bio

Information about V-day, a non-profit organization, fighting violence against women: http://www.vday.org/about/more-about

A great video in response to the cut in funding to Planned Parenthood where students declare that they “have sex”: http://feministing.com/2011/03/11/i-have-sex/

Courtesy of Hillary Combs.

Enjoying some gelato & great conversation in Bloomington, Indiana.