Drink Crystal Light and You'll "Get Wet" with an Attractive Man on an Exotic Island

I chose this title for my post because it points out the absurdity of this new Crystal Light commercial. Two "workaholic" women on a plane don't need to worry about bikini season until they get into a plane crash and find themselves stranded on an island with an attractive man. It ends with an image of a woman taking off her shirt saying "I'm going to get wet." So, what's so problematic about this commercial? It makes the assumption that women need to constantly fret about their weight because you never know when you'll get into a plane crash and be getting wet with a perfectly chiseled model?!


It also assumes that if you drink Crystal Light, you will be more attractive to a man, making a point that a woman's only power is her physical body and sexuality. The commercial begins with these women exclaiming that they won't be having fun because they are too busy working, so the working woman becomes this haggard, boring, and uninteresting archetype. 


I think what frustrates me the most about this commercial is the commentary surrounding it. For example, a blogger wrote, "I feel like women with a sense of humor appreciate this too. But there’s a few groups who might derail the happy feelings: angry feminists and prude conservatives. ANYTHING slightly controversial in a gendered manner tends to get the ire of feminists."


First, let's break those stereotypes about feminists (refer to this video for further details). Also, I saw an incredible documentary yesterday called Miss Representation. It examines how the media controls the choices young men and women make about their bodies, relationships, and careers. If young girls only see women on television taking off their clothes for men, then what kind of ambitions will they have for the future? Sure, this is just one commercial and many children might not pick up on the sexual innuendo, but all forms of media such as commercials, movies, television shows, etc. contribute to a big problem consuming young women. It's not funny that young women think they must dress "sexy" or diet to the point of starvation to become successful professionally and romantically. How do young women develop healthy senses of self amidst these controversial, limiting images? 

These images affect everyone and inform the ways men and women communicate with each other. It saddens me that so often I overhear the same conversation among men:

Boy 1: Hey, what did you do last night?

Boy 2: Man, I was hammered last night, and I think I banged like five girls.

These images and conversations need to be questioned. When I make these statements, Michael Jackson's lyrics to "Man in the Mirror" play in my head. 

I'm starting with the man in the mirror. I'm asking him to change his ways. If you want to make the world a better place, just look at yourself and make that change...

(Click to see a clip of Glee performing "Man in the Mirror")

Check out this cool new blog!

I am TAing a class this semester called "Empowering Girls." The students have a class blog where they will be posting thought-provoking links, clips, etc. Check out this link!

Is there ever a "good rape scene" in a movie?

A conversation I had a few days ago and this article on tumblr has me thinking again about portrayals of rape, assault, and rough sex in films. As a refresher, I addressed this topic when reviewing the film Unfaithful in a previous post. The article on tumblr discusses the author's disappointment with the rape scene in the American release of The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo. To be honest, I'm confused about this author's difference between a good and bad rape scene because is there is ever a "good rape scene" in a movie? I understand what she's trying to get at here. Rape is always bad, but the manner in which a director displays or handles the rape in the film gains different reactions from viewers. For example, some rape scenes in films can be confused with rough sex. Rape should get a strong negative reaction from the audience while rough sex should arouse the audience. 


Yet, these lines are so blurry, and I think this ambiguity has contributed to a LOT of debate about what constitutes rape. Portrayals of rape in films normalize violence against women, and more people need to be asking these directors: Is this rape scene essential to this film? Does it contribute to the character's transformation in the film?


I'm torn here because I think rape should be discussed in films, and there may be something beneficial in bringing a realistic portrayal of rape to a wide audience. But, I don't think directors in Hollywood have a woman's dignity and respect in mind when filming these scenes. No, I have not seen The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo, but the posters are oversexualized. Rooney Mara isn't wearing a shirt in this image:

Lisabeth is a strong female character, yet in this image she is reduced to a body to look at.  Her rape is an important part of the story, and I don't think it should be left out of the film, but there needs to be more caution when telling rape stories in films. Rape is a serious topic that should be handled with seriousness.

Thank for clarifying this, Ryan!

Why does sex always sell?

As I've been hunting down the best post-holiday sales, I've encountered the same old slogan: sex sells. For example, there's a line of makeup called NARS Orgasm. There's a set of blushes that will apparently give a woman the "effect of an ultimate super, uh hum, afterglow." There is something about naming a blush "G spot" and "super orgasm" that makes me uncomfortable. Why is that the only way to sell any product is to oversexualize it? I see a clear link between wearing this makeup and looking sexy for a man. It also bothers me that the point of this makeup is to make a woman look like she has just had an orgasm as if a woman's appearance is constantly on display for others. 


Yet, I can see the empowering message in this makeup. When I get dressed up or wear makeup, I like to look nice for myself. I just wonder why makeup must be associated with transforming one's physical body and therefore, inner feelings about herself. Is there a way for makeup to have a fun and useful function without the instant gratification that it makes a woman more "beautiful" than another, and therefore, more attractive to a romantic interest?

Beware: Women with Tools?!

Today while I was babysitting, I took the girls to pick out Christmas gifts for their family members, and it was shocking to see how gender-oriented the presents were (well, I guess it wasn't that shocking... Maybe just disappointing). There was a tape measure labeled "Dad Tape Measure: Dad at Work." Because apparently only men measure things. Wait, what?!

Are women "prone" to repeating past mistakes?

A few weeks ago, I was engaging in a conversation with my dad about women in relationships, and he said that, "Women stick to patterns, and go back to the same men over and over again." When I say patterns, I don't mean abusive relationships where women do not leave their significant others. I mean situations where women repeatedly like the same type of guy that is never right for them or women keep "hooking up" with the same guy that will never want more than free fun.

So why is it that women do this? I get the simple explanation: Women are weak and overly emotional, so they must return to their past hookup buddies hoping they have changed. But, I'm not buying that excuse because it's based on a lot of stereotypical bullshit about women. I have a couple of other possible explanations: Maybe women feel comfortable with these types of men and don't know who might be a better fit for them. I think relationships among 20-somethings have become so devalued in college culture. Maybe women think that's the best they can get, so they settle for hookups. I also think some women repeat past mistakes while others learn from them, so I think it's a grand generalization to say that all women are trapped in their past relationship mistakes. 

Just some thoughts on a rainy Monday night (a.k.a I don't want to do my take home exam or write my papers)

When you’re LOST, go to Iceland

As a senior in college, I frequently find myself the victim of dramatic mood swings. One moment I’m fed up with the drama of being around 18 to 22 year-olds and two minutes later I’m sobbing because I dread the moment I’ll have to say goodbye to my Denison family. In honor of my 21^st birthday a few weeks ago, I’ve chosen to write a reflective post about the lessons I’ve learned and the mistakes I want to warn myself against making again.

1. People will disappoint you, and they won’t acknowledge that they hurt your feelings. Some people deserve to be forgiven and deserve second chances, and others do not. People come and go in your life, but your true friends will make their presence felt even when they’re thousands of miles away.
2. Even the people that seem like they have their acts together are just as insecure as you are. They just hide it better.
3. One person’s perfect fit isn’t yours. Over the past semester, I’ve listened to hundreds of people give me their “life plans” after college. My reactions tend to range from happiness to jealousy to deep anxiety that my “life plan” is just not good enough or as prestigious. What I’ve learned is that YOU need to do what is best for YOU. I would also say this lesson applies to romantic relationships. Over the past few years, I’ve had a lot of anxiety about not fitting into appropriate social norms, and to be bluntly honest, I’d rather kiss a boy that thinks I’m wonderful than hook up with a bunch of random people, which leads me to my next lesson…
4. I’m a hopeless romantic, and I’m not compromising this even if the male market is looking sparse. Women deserve a hell of a lot more than a post-it, email, Facebook chat or texting relationship!
5. It’s okay if other people don’t get you. In the long run, fitting in just doesn’t matter as much. Anyhow, I’d rather stand out!
6. When you’re lost, go to Iceland because why not??!! Life is short, and I think if you don’t take chances, you’ll miss out on something wonderful.

Alright, after this melodramatic rant, I will be back to feminist blogging because I watched a lot of television over Thanksgiving, and I have a lot to say!

Iceland.